Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Life With/Life Without: Friends

The title of this one alone makes it sound like a bit of a social pariah. For the longest time, however, I was more or less kept from having any friends. X just made it nearly impossible to have any. The one I did have, he eventually sabotaged by getting into it with her man. After that, I never really tried to have any.

I started making friends again when the kids and I were in the shelter. It was nice. To have someone to talk to in the flesh, and not just through Facebook and the like. When we got the house, however, I once again retreated. The units around ours were mostly empty, and the ones that were occupied seemed to be single people, without kids. I had one friend in the complex, an old veteran named Andy, and he has been my walking buddy for treks up to Aldi and the occasional stroll down to QuikTrip.

My Facebook friend Ashley drove up from De Soto with her son when I had a class to take, and no sitter to watch the kids. I fed the mob pizza and paid her with A World of Ice and Fire. After class, we had a beer and mugged for some selfies, as the boys played with their Toothless figures. That was a blast.

I made it through the winter, and still more or less kept to myself and the kids, save our treks to Aldi with Andy, and my Facebook buddy Cynthia (and sometimes her little girl) that would drive down to help me with errands. We also went down to San Antonio with Ashley and her son to meet up with some other friends from a Facebook group to surprise a fellow mama who was going through a really dark time. We dropped Ryli off in Georgetown, however, as Dacey took the whole weekend off so she could spend time with her little sister. Cynthia got a job (yeah) so once again, it was just me and the kiddos, with an occasional stroll to the store with Andy.

Then spring came, and as the kids started to go outside more and more, I got to know some of the parents and grandparents of the kids friends. I started getting to know Nicole, one of my neighbors from the next building, who just finished up her first year teaching. And then, there's Jayden's G-Ma. 

Of the bunch, Nicole and I are definitely the closest. When the weather was awful, we agreed that since she was in an upstairs unit, she would hole up over here if the weather got too bad. She runs us to the store, and while school was still in session, she'd pick us up sometimes from Children's so we wouldn't have to take DART home. We have mastered the art of getting paid once a month, alternating who buys when we grub out on yum that we didn't cook. I found an ad on Craigslist for free kittens, and she took one to keep her Rosie company, while the kids each claimed one a piece.

I like having friends. It's nice to have someone that isn't related who "has your back" when you need a little help. I like the possibility of going to the Nacogdoches Film Festival next February with Ashley and Elizabeth. I have a blast on my little "cleaning parties" with Nicole ( we have both decided cleaning another person's house is a lot better than cleaning our own). It's just nice to have real, local friends, and those few that you get to see from time to time.